Sexualization of Kids Doesn't Yield Self-worth

After decades of sexual indoctrination by public schools and Planned Parenthood, a new study shows that it's not sex that America's youth crave, but rather affirmation of their value.

Recreational sex only diminishes self-worth (as adults know).

-- From "Young people crave self-esteem above sex: study" by Bernd Debusmann Jr, Reuters 1/11/11

Researchers from Ohio State University and Brookhaven National Laboratory in Upton, New York found that college students rated receiving compliments, or doing well on a test, above such pleasurable activities such as sex, receiving a paycheck, seeing a friend, or eating their favorite food.

Brad Bushman, a professor of communication and psychology at Ohio State University, said the findings should raise red flags about the role of self-esteem in society.

"It wouldn't be correct to say that the study participants were addicted to self-esteem," said Bushman, who headed the research team. "But they were closer to being addicted to self-esteem than they were to being addicted to any other activity we studied."

He said he and his team were shocked by the findings.

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From "Young people prefer praise to sex or money, study finds" by Sharon Jayson, USA TODAY 1/10/11

Self-esteem is misunderstood, says Robert Reasoner of Port Ludlow, Wash., who has been involved with the self-esteem movement for 40 years.

He says self-esteem is a basic human need.

It's about confidence in your ability to deal with life's challenges and a sense of personal worth, rather than generalized praise and undeserved rewards, he says.

The study is published online in the Journal of Personality.

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From "College Students Value Self-Esteem Over Sex" by LiveScience 1/10/11

Americans have come to think of boosting self-esteem as a solution to many societal problems, such as teen pregnancy and drug abuse, according to Bushman.

"But I think that is backwards," he said. "Good performance has to come before, not after, self-esteem."

There are also behavioral implications.

"The problem isn't with having high self-esteem; it's how much people are driven to boost their self-esteem," said study researcher Jennifer Crocker, a psychology professor at The Ohio State University. "When people highly value self-esteem, they may avoid doing things such as acknowledging a wrong they did. Admitting you were wrong may be uncomfortable for self-esteem at the moment, but ultimately, it could lead to better learning, relationships, growth and even future self-esteem."

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From "Choosing Self-Esteem Over Sex or Pizza" by Roni Caryn Rabin, New York Times 1/11/11

. . . Carol Landau, a clinical professor of psychiatry and medicine at Alpert Medical School at Brown University, pointed out that sex and alcohol are readily available on many college campuses and within students’ reach. Their accessibility could explain why students are more motivated to get good grades and positive feedback, which may be harder to come by. “The other rewards are somewhat within their control,” Dr. Landau said. “The self-esteem factors are not.”

Some researchers fault the emphasis placed on building and promoting self-esteem in children among certain schools of parenting and education.

“The idea has been that if we build their self-esteem, then they’ll do better in school and in relationships,” said Dr. Twenge, the “Narcissism Epidemic” author. “Well, that puts the cart before the horse. When you break down the research you see that kids who behave well and get high grades develop high self-esteem — not the other way around.”

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UCLA Finds Bullying Good for Kids

Psychology: youngsters who stand up to aggressors are more likely to develop social and emotional skills

UPDATE 10/24/10: Mom allows daughter to be bullied (video)


-- From "Bullying can be good for children" by Maurice Chittenden, The Sunday Times (UK) 5/23/10

A little childhood bullying may be good for you. Researchers have found that if boys or girls are able to stand up for themselves, being attacked by enemies can help their development.

Studies have shown that children become more popular among, and respected by, teachers and fellow pupils if they repay hostility in kind. They remember such experiences more vividly than friendly episodes, helping them to develop healthy social and emotional skills.

The research shows that while bullying is not always character-building, there can be advantages to being shouted at, or ostracised on Facebook.

In a series of experiments, psychologists from the University of California, Los Angeles (UCLA), measured the friendships and hostile relationships of 2,000 schoolchildren aged 11 and 12.

The experience gives children an early lesson that not everybody is going to like them in life and teaches them about conflict resolution.

Many successful people have identified being bullied at school and opting to fight back as a turning point in their lives.

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The Self-Esteem Movement Backfires -- When Praise is Dangerous

By Albert Mohler

The self-esteem movement has transformed much of America, but this is perhaps nowhere more evident than in the schools. A brilliant article in New York Magazine provides a fascinating glimpse into why the movement is crashing and burning.

As writer Po Bronson explains:

Since the 1969 publication of The Psychology of Self-Esteem, in which Nathaniel Branden opined that self-esteem was the single most important facet of a person, the belief that one must do whatever he can to achieve positive self-esteem has become a movement with broad societal effects. Anything potentially damaging to kids' self-esteem was axed. Competitions were frowned upon. Soccer coaches stopped counting goals and handed out trophies to everyone. Teachers threw out their red pencils. Criticism was replaced with ubiquitous, even undeserved, praise.

Author Melanie Phillips offered a devastating critique of the movement in her book All Must Have Prizes. As she revealed, achievement in all areas was being replaced with exercises intended to boost self-esteem. Every player on the team has to receive a prize and all prizes have to be equal. She put it this way in 2003:

Surely, in the immortal words of John McEnroe, they cannot be serious? Alas, the latest pronouncement from those in charge of our exam system is truly beyond satire.

Their new idea for boosting examination success is to abolish the very idea of failure, along with the difference between the right and the wrong answer to a question.

The article indicates that older children and teenagers learn to become cynical about the undeserved praise they receive from parents, teachers, and others. They actually perform better if they receive serious and skilled criticism, rather than empty praise.

Praising effort and achievement yields positive results. Praising for the sake of praising hurts far more than it helps. It is a recipe for individual and social disaster.

Read the whole article at AlbertMohler.com